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E-Mail Max and tell him
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Max@allourboys.com |
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Birthday:
May 10, 1992 |
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since 3-15-06 |
May 2010
Max is maintaining his personal goal to getting his high school diploma. With the help of our family friend, Paul A., Max continues to inch his way closer toward meeting his high school credits requirements. While he struggles with paying attention and keeping his mood stable, Max still gets up every morning to go to school. Once he completes high school Max hopes to become a chef or a bartender in Northern California. Paul has worked very hard with the high school and worked diligently to make sure Max has the supports in place that he needs for educational success. Max turns 18-years-old this month. Its hard to believe he will be an official adult. In so many ways, Max has been a man for a long time and in other ways Max still has the innocence of a much younger child. Its been a long hard path for Max, I only hope adulthood will be much easier on him.
November 2009
Max is now living in Northern California with a family friend who is an experienced special educator specializing in teenagers with severe emotional disturbance. Parenting Max at home became increasingly more difficult. Max's severe mood swings made family life difficult for everyone. Max is very fortunate that our friend can care for Max in his home. Without this resource I am afraid Max would need to return to boarding school. It's been hard for me to love Max so much but to realize I simple can't parent him safely within the scope of our family. For Max's part he is doing well in several of his elective classes. In fact he made me a beautiful set of roses in his welding class. Besides going to school Max still enjoys surfing the internet, playing video games and he has started to work out in a gym. I continue to be hopeful that Max will be able to mature enough to be a successful and law abiding young adult.
 May 2009
Max is home from Montana, We are happy to have Max home
but continue to worry about his choices. Max promises that
he will stay away from temptations. He also seems motivated
to graduate with his diploma from high school. So far so
good. Max has been getting an "A" in all of his academic
classes. He is totally thrilled not to have to go to school
on Saturday like he did in Montana! Otherwise Max is still
Max--full of energy with an easy and hardy laugh. Max is
looking forward to spending some time at Wild Rivers this
summer as well as surfing. He told us he missed those
activities the most last summer.
Next year Max
hopes to take drivers education and to get a job. When I
asked him what he wanted to do for a job, he said "I have no
idea!" Well some things never change.Even the idea of
turning 18 next year doesn't motivate Max to really think of
his future. Max tends to think only about the moment. I am
hoping next year will be a year of increased motivation and
maturity for Max.
November 2008
Max is slowly making some real positive progress with his behavior and his school work at Springcreek Academy! Max was "student of the week" at school this month and his behavior has shown a real turn around in the past several weeks. This is fantastic growth for Max. Max continues to get group and individual therapy along with a very structured residential and academic setting. We have been able to talk to Max several times on the phone and each time he seems happier and increasingly proud of his accomplishments. Max seems to finally be thriving and seems to be really working toward graduating from the program and coming home!
September 2008
We have talked to Max twice on the phone from his boarding school. He has to earn phone privileges which has proven to be quite challenging. Max definitely wants to come home but he understands that he needs to work through his program. Max is struggling with the same behavioral issues at Spring Creek that he had at home. The good news is that Max doesn't have access to the temptations while in this program as the location is well away from the city. Max is attending school six-days a week to try to catch-up on his credits. He is also receiving individual and group counseling. Max attends an "adoption group" where the students work through their issues related to adoption. We miss Max but we believe this experience will be Max's best opportunity to get on track with his behavior and his relationships before he becomes an adult.
July 2008
Max continued to have serious behavioral issues at home and at school up until the middle of June. We decided to place Max in an out-of-state boarding school for teenagers with behavioral and emotional challenges. We felt like we had no other choice. Neither our school district or the medical and behavioral health professionals had any other suggestions. So far Max seems to be adjusting to his new school. He writes to us several times a week and we speak with the program staff weekly. This school required Max to cut his hair and wear a uniform which I am sure did not please him. He also attends classes six days a week. On the other hand he is maintaining a "B" average in school and catching up with his high school credits. This is outstanding progress for Max! Max will likely stay in this residential school program for about one full school year or maybe a little longer. We hope that Max will have made enough progress with his impulse control and his aggression to be able to return home on a full-time basis. Max loves mail so any e-mails or letters of encouragement sent to Max will be printed and forwarded to him.
May 2008
In April Max's aggressive behavioral challenges
escalated to the point of him needing a week-long stay at
College Hospital. We were worried that Max would not be able
to be managed at home but thankfully due to some medication
changes, a school placement change, and group and individual
counseling Max has been doing fairly well since his return
home. We are happy with the positive behavioral changes we
have seen in Max recently. His mood has stabilized somewhat
and he is actually smiling again. Since his hospital stay
Max enjoyed a long weekend with a couple of his brothers in
San Francisco and a day trip to Catalina. Both trips Max did
very well behaviorally. Max is also attending a specialized
education program for high school students with emotional
challenges. So far Max has done well (for Max!) in the
program and is actually catching up with high school
credits. Max was so far behind when he started the Pathways
program but has continued to complete his work so much so
that I can't believe there might be a chance that Max may
graduate on time. We are hopefully that Max will continue to
make good choices regarding his behavior and that his mood
disorder continues to be medically managed so that he does
not require future hospitalizations.

February 2008
Max continues to struggle with his mood disorder. This type of mental health issue can be extremely challenging at any time but especially during the teenage years when teenagers moods are up and down anyway, Its hard to determine what Max's triggers are and at times it feels like we are walking on egg shells. Other times Max can be very friendly and loving. We continue to work through Max's mood and attachment issues with counseling. Progress is slow but sure!
Max is looking forward to going snowboarding before the snow melts. Its not often that Max likes a full day of physical activities. He would much rather sit in front on his computer or text message his friends on his cell phone. A full day of snowboarding will certainly burn some of his excess energy and tire him out! I wish we could find other similar activities like that he would like. Since Max is an excellent swimmer, I am hoping I can get him to try surfing lessons this summer.
November 2007
Since Max's adoption, he seems a lot more relaxed. Certainly Max has his challenging moments but there is much less anxiety on a daily basis. Max seems more agreeable and less angry. Since September, Max has really been enjoying high school...except for the academic part! Max continues to struggle academically and really balks at a challenge. We continue to encourage him to try his best and the high school staff have been very helpful about putting in whenever supports Max needs to be successful. Socially, Max is doing very well. He is starting to make friends and maintain friendships. Sometimes he doesn't always make the best decisions about hanging out with his friends or going to class, so we are working on that! Max has also discovered girls, which---I am afraid---is a whole other chapter!!
September 2007
Wow!! Max's adoption is finally complete. It was a long wait for his finalization. During the last year Social Services got involved with Max's case. Although this was initially a private adoption from the disrupting family, we felt that Max needed the advocacy and the services that the county foster care system could offer. Social Services did not allow us to share Max's progress over the past year and only after his adoption were we able to post his pictures back on the web site again. Over the past year Max has struggled some with his impulse control and his anger. After his first adoptive family disrupted, Max was fearful to trust us and the concept that we would be his "forever family." I can imagine it would be difficult for anyone, most especially a 15-year old to trust adults again after a long history of abuse and abandonment. Slowly with time and outside support Max seems to be settling in.
This summer he had some very successful camp experiences, making friends and even meeting some girls! Recently Max started high school which has been a very positive experience so far, and finally the adoption! We have seen a BIG change in Max's attitude and self-esteem in the past few months. We hope that Max's emotional progress will continue. We look forward to parenting Max and know we will be able to work through some of Max's issues.

October 2006
We are excited to be able to move forward with Max's adoption. Since joining our family, about eight months ago, Max slowly begun to trust us when we say that we are his permanent and "forever family." Obviously it has been difficult for Max to have multiple moves over his short life time. It will definitely take time for Max to trust the current adults in his life. It seems like Max spends a lot of time "testing" our commitment to him. We hope over time the "testing" will lessen and the "trusting" will increase. In the mean time Max continues to make progress in 8th grade, has signed up for basketball, and is looking forward to a trip to Halloween Haunt at Knott's Berry Farm later this month.
 July 2006
Max is enjoying his summer! He has attended a week
at Camp James and two weeks at Pali Adventures Camp. Both camps reported that Max was a pleasure and that he had very few behavioral challenges. It
is great to know that Max can be so successful in high-energy residential and day camp programs. Max is looking forward to attending Sports Camp in early August. Max is very excited about attending camp and says he wishes he had more time to try out other camp programs. Its wonderful to see what a great match Max was for our family. We are so pleased with all of his social development and progress in attaching to family members. Max is such a valued and important part of our family its hard to imagine that he has only been with us for five months.
May 2006
Max is doing great! We are especially excited about his
progress in school. Max will be in more advanced classes
next year. He has really put his best effort into completing
his homework and participating in class. Max has seemed to
develop many very positive relationships at school,
especially with Dr. Morrow, the school principal. This has
kept Max very motivated to do his best at school.
Max is also doing
well at home. He generally gets along well with his new
brothers and he tries to be helpful around the house. Max
has had some time to get to know Jim and visits him at least
once a week in the hospital. Max recently celebrated his
14th birthday. He enjoyed his party at home and he is really
looking forward to a session or two of paintball with a
couple of his brothers and school friends.
 March 2006 Max (13) seems to be adjusting to the family quite well. Max is already acting like he has been with us forever, one minute getting along well with his brothers and the next minute complaining about them.
Max is attending the same middle school as many of the boys and it is great to see them all get along as they walk to school together.
Max is already involved in skateboard lessons and may soon start in Tae Kwon Do classes.
We are excited to have Max join the family.

February 2006
Max will be joining our family in mid-March. Max was adopted from Russia about three years ago. He once lived at Orphanage 29 in the Moscow area. This was the same orphanage that Sergei lived before he was adopted.
Max is understandably nervous about changing families, but also excited about having brothers for the first time. We look forward to helping Max transition smoothly into our ever-growing family.

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