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December 2011
Joseph (10) joined our family in August. He was originally adopted from Kazakhstan as a toddler. He was no longer able to stay in his first adoptive family due to significant behavioral challenges. During his first month with our family Joseph was, behaviorally, one of the most difficult children I parented in a long time. I almost thought I wouldn't be able to keep him. I had to put all my effort into settling Joseph down. I definitely saw most of the issues the first adoptive family saw in Joseph. Despite a near mutiny of my family helpers we all hung in there by a thread for the first month. Thankfully things started settling down for Joseph slowly after that first trying month. Four months later, while he still has his difficult days, Joseph can be a very sweet and loving boy. He sends me "love e-mails" every day. Joseph is much more able to be redirected to appropriate behavior when he starts to have difficulty. He continues to have a hard time with activities that are new. Joseph needs lots of discussion before he is willing to try something new. He wants to know how we are going to get there, what are we going to do there, what are the rules, how long are we going to stay. Even activities like going to Disneyland can be extremely difficult with Joseph unless he knows exactly what is going to happen. Once Joseph participates in an activity and gets past his initial anxiety, he is willing to go again without too much fanfare. Even though Joseph can be very needy, he is also a warm and loving child. I am really enjoying being his mom.
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